Canadian Archives - Candyrageous

March 24, 2021March 28, 2021 Michael

Mr. Big – Boring, but Tasty

Candy Bars

Mr. Big is one of those old, reliable candy bars that isn’t particularly exciting, but gets the job done. I was under the impression that it was a Canadian-only thing, but apparently it was released in the States in 1995.

Featuring a wafer surrounded by caramel, puffed rice, peanuts, and chocolate, this was a favourite of mine as a kid — mostly because, as the name implies, it’s bigger than average, and I was a fat kid.

It’s still good. The chewy caramel contrasts nicely with the crispy wafer and puffed rice. I guess there are peanuts as well, but they’re stingily applied and don’t make much of an impact.

The chocolate is probably the weakest link — I’m not even sure if it’s real chocolate (the ingredients lists three types of oil, though unsweetened chocolate is there as well), but whatever it is, it’s not the best. There’s enough going on here that doesn’t make a huge difference, but it’s a bummer regardless.

Manufactured by: Cadbury
Nutritional info (1 bar, 60 grams): 290 calories, 14 grams of fat (8 grams of saturated fat, 0.1 grams of trans fat), 5 mg of cholesterol, 100 mg of sodium, 41 grams of carbohydrates, 1 grams of fibre, 33 grams of sugar, 1 gram of protein.
Ingredients: Sugar, glucose syrup, modified palm oil, modified milk ingredients, rice, modified vegetable oil, wheat flour (with barley), peanuts, cocoa, unsweetened chocolate, corn starch, salt, hydrogenated palm oil, malt extract, soy lecithin, baking soda, citric acid, natural and artificial flavour.

March 7, 2021March 14, 2021 Michael

Pal-O-Mine – An Unpleasant Sugar Overload

Candy Bars

If you follow this blog at all, you’ll notice that it’s exceedingly rare that I give anything less than two out of four. I mean, it’s candy. How bad can it be?? Candy bars are like pizza; even when they’re bad, they’re still pretty good.

But there are exceptions, of course. Enter: Pal-O-Mine, an old-timey Canadian chocolate bar (the packaging proudly proclaims that it’s a “Ganong original since 1920”). How it’s managed to stick around for so long is a complete mystery to me.

It’s upsettingly sweet. It hurt my teeth and burned my throat. It gave me a mild pain behind my eyes, which basically never happens. I had to eat a pickle after just to cleanse my palate of the overriding sugariness. It’s sweet.

The wrapper describes it as “fudge & peanuts,” and I guess you can taste a mild peanutty flavour if you really concentrate, but mostly it’s just like eating pure sugar.

The soft fudge is covered in a fairly generous layer of dark chocolate, which you’d think would temper the sweetness a bit and bring the bar a nice chocolatey flavour — but it accomplishes neither of those things. It’s lost in the tidal wave of sweetness.

You know those really bottom-of-the-barrel boxes of chocolate you can get at the dollar store? The kind that makes Pot of Gold look gourmet in comparison? That’s what Pal-O-Mine reminded me of. It’s just soft and sweet and unpleasant. If you’re a real sugar fiend maybe it’ll do something for you, but otherwise there’s a reason you’ve likely never heard of it.

Manufactured by: Ganong
Nutritional info (2 pieces, 55 grams): 210 calories, 6 grams of fat (3.5 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat), 5 mg of cholesterol, 10 mg of sodium, 39 grams of carbohydrates, 1 gram of fibre, 33 grams of sugar, 1 grams of protein.
Ingredients: Sugars (sugar, yellow sugar, glucose, lactose), dark chocolate (sugar, chocolate liquor, cocoa butter, milk fat, soy lecithin, vanilla flavour), milk ingredients, peanuts, salt, dried egg white (egg white, citric acid, baker’s yeast), natural and artificial flavour.

February 28, 2021 Michael

Tim Hortons Double Double Coffee Bar – The Taste of Coffee with the Texture of Chocolate

Candy Bars

I’ll admit that I sometimes feel like I’ll never be a real Canadian. Yes, I was born here, and yes, I’ve lived here all my life. But I don’t like hockey, I don’t drink coffee, and I’m not a fan of pretty much anything on the Tim Hortons menu (the old fashioned and sour cream doughnuts are both decent, but that’s about it).

If Tim Hortons were to bring back the tragically discontinued Walnut Crunch, I might be able to call myself a fan of their establishment, and my Canadianness would be affirmed. Until then: Tim Hortons is bad. Sorry, every other Canadian, but it’s true.

This particular “Coffee Bar” is basically trying to replicate drinking a cup of coffee with a ton of sugar and cream (for the non-Canadians in the room, a double double is a coffee with two sugars and two creams). The odd thing about it is that it looks like chocolate, but isn’t — the main ingredients are cocoa butter and coffee, so it has the texture of chocolate but the flavour of coffee (with a whole bunch of sugar and cream).

It’s decent enough. I’m not a coffee drinker, so I can’t comment on the subtleties of the coffee flavour, but it tasted fine to me. It’s quite sweet, which does a decent job of rounding out the bitterness of the coffee. And the texture is mostly pretty good, with a nice snap and a pleasant creaminess. That creaminess is marred, however, by the presence of tiny little coffee bits that add an unpleasant graininess to the bar.

Manufactured by: The Whole Coffee Company
Nutritional info (1 bar, 38 grams): 220 calories, 16 grams of fat (9 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat), 5 mg of cholesterol, 40 mg of sodium, 19 grams of carbohydrates, 0 grams of fibre, 18 grams of sugar, 2 grams of protein.
Ingredients: Whole coffee matter (cocoa butter, Tim Hortons coffee), sugars (cane sugar, lactose), milk, whey, maltodextrin, sunflower lecithin, natural flavour, salt.

February 14, 2021February 20, 2021 Michael

Coffee Crisp Stix: Salted Caramel – Sweet Wafery Goodness

Candy Bars

What is that thick layer in the middle of a Coffee Crisp? Flavoured white chocolate? I honestly have no idea.

Whatever it is, it’s missing from Coffee Crisp Stix. I would have thought that this would make this thing taste less like Coffee Crisp and more like a generic wafer bar, but its identity is relatively intact; it definitely has the distinctive flavour of its namesake.

I basically tastes like a lighter, more wafery version of Coffee Crisp. It’s tasty in most of the same ways, so suffice it to say, if you like Coffee Crisp you’re probably going to like this (and if you’re not Canadian and have no idea what Coffee Crisp is — don’t worry, you’re not missing out on anything too mind-blowing).

I’m pretty sure the exterior is actually mockolate and not chocolate (it’s pretty waxy), but it’s thin enough that it’s not really a big deal.

As for the salted caramel, I didn’t notice much of a caramel flavour, but there’s definitely a mild saltiness that does a nice job of complimenting the bar’s sweetness.

Manufactured by: Nestle
Nutritional info (2 bars, 32 grams): 160 calories, 8 grams of fat (4.5 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat), 5 mg cholesterol, 65 mg of sodium, 22 grams of carbohydrates, 1 gram of fibre, 14 grams of sugar, 2 grams of protein.
Ingredients: Sugar, modified palm and vegetable oils, wheat flour, modified milk ingredients, cocoa mass, cocoa butter, soy lecithin, salt, coffee, cocoa, baking soda, yeast, polyglycerol polyricinoleate, protease, xylanase, natural flavours.