dessert Archives - Candyrageous

October 18, 2020January 10, 2021 Michael

Kit Kat Apple Pie – Nails the Apple Pie Flavour

Candy Bars

I’ll admit that I was actually pretty excited to try this one. I mean, it’s Apple Pie Kit Kat; if you don’t think that’s irresistible then you and me are very different people.

I got a bit less excited when I looked at the ingredients list and noticed that there isn’t anything even remotely resembling an apple in what is ostensibly a candy bar all about apples.

But then I took a bite and got excited again because holy cow this thing tastes a surprising amount like a slice of apple pie. Like, it’s weird how much it tastes like apple pie. It nailed that flavour way more than I thought it would, particularly after perusing the ingredients.

Specifically, it tastes like apple pie a la mode, with a hint of tartness from whatever scientific magic they used to replicate the apple flavour, a subtle hint of cinnamon and other spices, a decent amount of pie crust flavour from the wafers, and a milky creaminess that made me think of pie a la mode. I’m shocked that this is as good as it is; I enjoyed the hell out of it.

Between this and the birthday cake variety, Kit Kat is absolutely knocking it out of the park with these novelty flavours that have the potential to be horrible but are actually amazing.

Manufactured by: Hershey
Nutritional info (1 package, 42 grams): 220 calories, 12 grams of fat (7 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat), 0 mg of cholesterol, 40 mg of sodium, 27 grams of carbohydrates, 0 grams of fibre, 20 grams of sugar, 2 grams of protein.
Ingredients: Sugar, vegetable oil (palm oil, shea oil, sunflower oil, palm kernel oil, and/or safflower oil), wheat flour: skim milk, corn syrup solids, lactose (milk). Contains 2% or less of: chocolate, natural flavor and artificial flavor, lecithin (soy), salt, yeast, baking soda, artificial color (yellow 6 lake, yellow 5 lake, blue 2 lake, red 40 lake), PGPR.

October 7, 2020January 10, 2021 Michael

Mallo Cup – Overly Sweet Marshmallow Cups

Candy Bars

It’s been several years since I’ve had a Mallo Cup; my memory is that it’s basically an inferior version of Valomilk. But then Valomilk isn’t exactly easy to find. I’ve only ever seen it in the Cracker Barrel gift shop, which makes it pretty much impossible to buy at the moment. Popping down to the States for a day trip probably isn’t going to be in the cards for quite a while.

Well, Mallo Cup, it turns out, is exactly as I remembered. It’s fine? I guess? But Valomilk is the superior candy in literally every regard, and they’re so similar that it’s impossible not to compare them.

It’s a pretty simple concept; it’s a chocolate cup filled with marshmallow creme (which the packaging calls “whipped creme”). Mallo Cup distinguishes itself from Valomilk by including coconut flakes in the chocolate, but they’re otherwise identical.

The coconut is actually a nice touch; it adds a very subtle crispy texture and a hint of coconut flavour. The cups are a bit bland aside from intense sweetness, so I actually wish there were a bit more coconut. But it’s fine.

That’s the thing, there’s nothing overtly wrong with it — the gooey creme and the creamy chocolate make for a satisfying combo. But the flavour is one-note sweet; neither the chocolate nor the creme have all that much flavour other than an overriding sugariness. It’s decent enough, but since Valomilk is a thing that exists in the world, it’s kinda superfluous.

Manufactured by: Boyer
Nutritional info (2 cups, 42 grams): 200 calories, 8 grams of fat (5 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat), <5 mg cholesterol, 40 mg sodium, 30 grams of carbohydrates, 24 grams of sugar, 0 grams of fibre, 1 gram of protein.
Ingredients: Milk chocolate (sugar, cocoa butter, milk, chocolate liquor, and soy lecithin), corn syrup, sugar, water, coconut, dextrin, egg white, salt, guar gum, natural and artificial flavor, potassium sorbate (to preserve freshness) and soy lecithin.

July 19, 2020January 10, 2021 Michael

Kit Kat Chunky: Cookie Dough – A Downgrade From the Original

Candy Bars

Everyone loves cookie dough. It’s delicious. That’s just a scientific fact. And Kit Kat Chunky? Also objectively delicious. So then Kit Kat Chunky: Cookie Dough must also be delicious. Okay, well, that was a short review — see you next week.

Wait, what’s that? It’s not delicious? Well then. I guess a bit more of a review is necessary.

The biggest problem here is the so-called cookie dough; it does a fairly abysmal job of recapturing that particular taste. If you close your eyes and really use your imagination you might be able to conjure up vague whiffs of cookie dough flavour, but mostly, it just tastes like an overly sweet, sugary paste. If this had been a blind taste test, I’m not sure that I ever would have figured out what it was supposed to be.

That’s an issue, because:

A) If I buy something that says cookie dough on the packaging, I kinda want it to taste like cookie dough. I feel like that’s not unreasonable?

B) It throws off the balance of the Kit Kat Chunky. The wafer here is reduced by about 50 percent to accommodate the layer of “cookie dough.” In a normal Kit Kat, the wafer does a great job of balancing out the bar’s sweetness, but the thinner one here is a bit overwhelmed.

The whole thing is still decent enough, but it’s clearly inferior to a regular Kit Kat Chunky in every regard. If you really need Kit Kat + cookie dough in your life, just buy a standard Kit Kat Chunky and a package of cookie dough and eat them together. Problem solved.

Manufactured by: Nestle
Nutritional info (1 bar, 52 grams): 280 calories, 16 grams of fat (9 grams of saturated fat, 0.2 grams of trans fat), 15 mg cholesterol, 55 mg sodium, 30 grams of carbohydrates, 26 grams of sugar, 1 gram of fibre.
Ingredients: Sugars (sugar, glucose), modified milk ingredients, modified palm oil, cocoa butter, wheat flour, unsweetened chocolate, palm and vegetable oils, soy and sunflower lecithin, cocoa powder, natural and artificial flavours, polyglycerol polynoleate, salt, baking soda, yeast, calcium sulphate, ammonium carbonate, citric acid, protease, xylanase, ascorbic acid, potassium carbonate, sodium phosonate.

July 15, 2020January 10, 2021 Michael

Crunch – New and Not-So-Improved

Candy Bars, Chocolate

You may not realize this, but you couldn’t buy Crunch for a little while; in 2018, Nestle sold Crunch to Ferrero, who pulled it off the shelves so that they could “reformulate” it.

Well, it’s back, and either I’m remembering Crunch being better than it was, or it’s gone down in quality. Which is weird; you’d think the jump from Nestle to Ferrero (the makers of Nutella, Ferrero Rocher, and many other delicious things) would be a clear upgrade. Alas.

Still, it’s not bad. It’s also not “good” per se; the chocolate is fairly bottom-of-the-barrel, with a generic sweetness and not a whole lot going on in the flavour department, and even the crispy rice is a bit more anemic than you’d expect (it’s mildly crispy, but the texture isn’t quite there).

Also, this is purely psychological, but I miss the old design of the bar, with the big embossed “Crunch” lettering. The new segmented bar is boring in comparison.

And yet… I mostly enjoyed it. The chocolate has a nice creaminess, and while the rice doesn’t bring the assertive crunch you’re looking for in a bar called Crunch, it still has enough of that creamy/crispy contrast to be satisfying. If I didn’t have nostalgia for the old Crunch bar my opinion on this would probably be a bit lower, but I do, so here we are. I didn’t particularly like it at first, but it (mostly) grew on me.

Manufactured by: Ferrero
Nutritional info (1 bar, 43.9 grams): 230 calories, 12 grams of fat (8 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat), 5 mg of cholesterol, 60 mg of sodium, 29 grams of carbohydrates, 1 gram of fibre, 24 grams of sugar, 2 grams of protein.
Ingredients: milk chocolate (sugar, chocolate, cocoa butter, nonfat milk, milkfat, lactose, soy lecithin, natural flavour), crisped rice (rice flour, sugar, barley malt, salt).

July 12, 2020January 10, 2021 Michael

Wunderbar – Chewy, Crunchy, Crispy, Peanut Buttery, and Delicious

Candy Bars

Wunderbar is a classic — known as Starbar in the UK, it’s been around since the ’70s, but has apparently never been sold in the States. This is clearly America’s loss. It’s so good.

If you’re an American and have never been blessed with the deliciousness of the Wunderbar, it features crunchy peanut butter mixed with puffed rice that’s surrounded by chewy caramel and milk chocolate.

I haven’t had one in years, but it’s just as delightful as I remembered it being. It’s got everything you want in a candy bar: it’s chewy, it’s crunchy, it’s crispy, and the sweetness is perfectly tuned — it’s delicious.

The puffed rice is a stroke of genius; it gives the bar a memorable crispiness that sets it apart from something like a Reese Peanut Butter Cup. Between that, the very chewy caramel, and the crunchy chunks of peanuts, you’ve got a bar with a really satisfying contrast of textures.

The layer of decent quality chocolate on the outside is substantial enough to add a decent hit of flavour which — of course — works nicely with the peanut butter. I mean, why wouldn’t it? Peanut butter and chocolate are best friends. The rich caramel only adds more flavour, and the bar has a very mild saltiness that rounds things out.

Manufactured by: Cadbury
Nutritional info (58 g bar): 290 calories, 17 g of fat (8 g of saturated fat, 0.1 g of trans fat), 0 mg of cholesterol, 105 mg of sodium, 32 g of carbohydrates, 1 g of fibre, 26 g of sugar, 4 g of protein.
Ingredients: Sugar, glucose syrup peanuts. modified palm oil, modified milk ingredients, hydrogenated palm kernel oil, modified vegetable oil, rice, cocoa, unsweetened chocolate, salt, malt extract (barley wheat), soy lecithin, baking soda, calcium chloride, monoglycerides, natural and artificial flavor.